While Stephen Cobert's character may not be someone you would turn to for empathy and understanding, he is a very effective listener! The host of Comedy Central's The Colbert Report (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Colbert_Report) often interviews authors and celebrities on his show. During interviews, however, he interrupts his guests, and he exaggerates and twists their comments to outrageous extremes.
So why would I say Cobert is a very effective listener? Because he hosts a comedy show and he is funny! He does his prep work so that he can often begin the interview with a humorous attack. He listens carefully to his guests' arguments so that he can twist it into something funny. His guests may not always be able to make their points, but Cobert often gets the last laugh.
You may be a very effective listener, in that you are very effective in achieving your conversation goals. Your goals may be humor, to solve problems, to act like a boss who always appears confident with an answer, or to correct a child who is always screwing up. However, what is the other person's goal? Do they want a good laugh from a zinger? Do they want to be told what to do? Are they looking to be assured that you're confident and always have an answer? Do they want to be reprimanded? What if they just want to be heard? What if they just need a little guidance? What if they want help to fix something? How would you listen then?
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